• Nathan Max

YOU'RE FIRED!


Photo Credit: David Becker/Getty Images.

Our four-year national nightmare is almost over.


Former Vice President Joe Biden has won the presidential election and will replace Donald Trump on Jan. 20, 2021, much to the relief of at least half the nation and most of the planet. Trump will likely carry on with his frivolous lawsuits and hopeless recounts, and he will continue his refusal to concede the race, but the man is just grasping at this point.


The people have spoken. The mad president’s reign of incompetence will be coming to a merciful end in 75 days. It was not the decisive repudiation Democrats had hoped for, but the No. 1 objective of this election has been achieved. America is about to turn the page on one of the most disgraceful and embarrassing eras in our history, even if Trump has to be dragged out of the White House kicking and screaming.


Come January, the United States will once again embrace its allies and confront our adversaries abroad. Our executive branch will stop apologizing for white nationalists and tacitly courting their support at home. Our president will lead the entire country as one, and not penalize states that voted against him out of spiteful vindictiveness.


Crucially, this nation will start listening to scientists, most pressingly in the fight to contain the coronavirus, which is spiraling out of control. Electing Joe Biden will likely save, at minimum, tens of thousands of lives.


Donald Trump, who prematurely declared victory early Wednesday morning and accused our election of being fraudulent when he wasn’t declared the winner right away, now must worry about impending prosecution for his many crimes. His wretched children face the same ignominious fate.


The president outperformed all expectations in this election, but it wasn’t enough. No reputable poll had this race being competitive, yet Trump nearly pulled off a second straight stunner, despite losing the popular vote again. Clearly, Trump has programmed his legion of loyal supporters to follow him to the bitter end, just like other cult leaders who came before him.


Trump drove turnout by holding massive rallies in the last month that endangered his followers’ lives, and his supporters rewarded him for it. Trump received millions more votes than four years ago.


In all likelihood, we have not heard the last from Donald Trump. In theory, he could run for president again in 2024. Would an overweight and unhealthy man have the vigor to pursue a return to the White House at age 78? If he delays justice long enough, winning a rematch could very well be a get-out-of-jail-free card.


At minimum, we are in for years of listening to the pathetic grievances of America’s historically worst president. He will surely continue to tweet, go on TV and possibly stage more rallies to let us all know how unfairly he’s been treated. The man requires attention, and he is addicted to the adulation his gatherings provide. Not even a deadly pandemic could blunt his pathological need for them.


Trump came shockingly close to victory, but at the end of the day this man only has himself to blame for his defeat.


If Donald Trump had led a responsible, scientific-based response to the virus, he could have won easily. He would have shown a skeptical nation that he had the chops to be a real leader. Instead, he showed the world that he has the management skills of a businessman who declared bankruptcy six times and couldn’t make a casino profitable.


Even with the disastrous virus response, with almost a quarter-million Americans dead, with 120,000 new confirmed cases a day, the president still came within a whisker of another four years in office. Despite running the most scandal-ridden administration in American history, by far, Donald Trump barely lost.


Donald Trump has led a charmed life. He was born into wealth and privilege. He has never faced consequences for his frequent mendacity or other reprehensible actions. And, even though he is a terrible person, he is loved and admired by tens of millions of Americans. Despite all the chaos and madness, nearly 48 percent of the electorate saw Donald Trump and said, “I want me some more of that!”


Thankfully, they were slightly outnumbered.

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